Gone Wild (2019 Reissue) Read online

  “Do you think we’ll find a rabbit soon?” I bring my focus back to the reason we’re marching knee deep in an endless sea of white.

  “Not if you keep talking, chatty Cathy.” He smirks.

  “What’s a chatty Cathy? Is that a show or something? Or just an expression?” I peer up at him and he sighs.

  “I don’t know. I think it was a doll that never shut up and scared away rabbits.” He twists his lips downward and looks around the glistening forest.

  The silence is eerie. I can’t hear anything except for our breathing. It’s a far cry from the endless buzzing of the city. The roar of the traffic. The chatter of friends. The constant dinging of people’s cell phones. “When you’re hunting rabbits, you have to be like Elmer Fudd, remember him?” He ignores my blank stare. “You have to be vewy, vewy quiet.”

  I can’t help but laugh at the bad impression. “How old are you again? Chatty Cathy? Elmer Fudd? That’s before my time there, old man.” I giggle.

  “I’m not old, I’m wise.” He smiles. I feel like I sipped some hot cocoa topped with marshmallows, all warmed up from my forehead to my toes.

  Sawyer looks at the sky and the smile slips from his lips. “The storm is going to roll in really soon.” He looks back over the trail we’ve left in the snow, then back at the sky. “This old man is wise enough to know that we’re not going to make it back to the cabin before this gets bad.”

  “What do you mean?” I bend my head back and stare at the snow tumbling down from the sky. “We have to get back.” I try to push down the panic rising in my chest. Did he save me just so I could freeze anyway?

  “No, we need to build a shelter,” he answers firmly and shrugs free from his hiking bag, placing it at his feet.

  A shelter? “Like, an igloo?” I’ve seen pictures of them, but never seen one in real life.

  “Not really.” Sawyer pulls a small spade out of his bag and yanks on the handle, extending it out. “You see that huge drift there?” He points the retractable shovel at a thick mound of snow.

  “Yeah.” I nod.

  “We’re going to hunker down inside of that. I’m going to make a snow cave. It’s easier than an igloo, trust me.” He walks over to the snow bank and begins to carve out his plan while I stand and watch the sky darken and the flakes intensify.

  Trust him. That’s what he said. It’s funny how, in reality, he’s still a stranger. I don’t know that much about him, really. If we’d met under different circumstances, we wouldn’t have given each other the time of day. And yet, I do trust him. I trust his judgment and I trust his character.

  Now, if I could only learn to trust my own heart. Maybe I could figure out a way to keep him in my life.

  25

  Sawyer

  The shelter surrounds us, keeping us out of the elements. However, our hunt was a total bust. There’s got to be a way to forget this hunger gnawing in my gut.

  “Come here.” My voice is raspy as I pull her into me tight. I kiss her slowly, but deliberately, allowing my fingers to trail down the side of her neck as my kisses stray across her jawline and farther still, to her collarbone. She shivers in my arms, so I shield her from the wind by turning my back against the breeze swirling around us.

  I can forget about my hunger by feeding my starvation for a taste of her.

  As my fingers trail over the edge of her pants, I pull on the waistband, slowly inching it down over her plump, round ass. “No, wait, we can’t do this here! It’s too cold,” she weakly protests.

  “Not to worry.” I continue tugging the hem away from her body. “I’ll warm you up. Besides, there’s no way I’m waiting until we’re back at the cabin to feel you. I need your body against mine. Right here. Now.” I yank her pants the rest of the way down and draw a thin, invisible line up the inside of her clenched thighs, pushing my fingers between them to her soaking wet center. I smile as her juices coat my fingertips, proof that she’s as turned on as I am right now.

  I sink my fingers in my mouth, eager to lick her nectar from them. My mouth is thirsty for her sweet juices.

  I wrap my hand around the back of her head, drawing her into my lips. I pull her bottom lip in with my teeth and give it a little tug, making her gasp with desire. Elsie abruptly pulls away, holding my gaze with her blue eyes, and makes quick work of removing her coat and peeling off her shirt, up over her head, in a single tug.

  She stands as tall as she can manage in our secluded snow fort. I can see the heat of her breath cling to the air in a cloud of passion as she breathes quick and shallow. She shimmies out of her pants, wiggling her hips as she teases me. It takes all the restraint I have to stop myself from ripping the fabric clean from her body.

  A long shiver licks her spine as she stands in front of me naked. She’s a vision. I quickly throw my parka on the floor of our snow cave and unbutton my shirt impatiently, cursing every stupid buttonhole. My pants are a pool of denim on the snow floor not even seconds later.

  I wrap my arm around the small of her back and pull her toward me, leaning in and leaving a trail of kisses over her stomach down to the heat of her tight pussy that my mouth waters for. Her natural perfume is making me crazy, and I jab my finger between her wet lips and hold them open, staring at her clit as I lick my lips with anticipation.

  Diving my face between her thighs, she giggles as my beard tickles the soft skin between her legs. However, her giggles quickly transform into moans as my tongue swirls from side to side, devouring her sweet juices. I wrap my hands around her round ass and hold her steady as I thrash my tongue over her clit.

  Her moans grow louder as she rocks forward by pushing herself up on her tippy toes like she’s torn between trying to escape my tongue and chasing her pleasure. Sucking her clit in past my lips, I flicker my tongue over her sensitive nub relentlessly until her hands are twisting in my hair as her cries of passion are filling my ears.

  Elsie slumps down over me, holding herself up by propping her hands on my shoulders. She’s panting in my ear as I feel the trembles of little aftershocks run through her smooth skin.

  I’ve taken all the time I can stand. I need to feel her walls clench against me. I need to feel her milk me dry, like her pussy was designed to empty me of every last drop of my seed. To quiver against me as I fill it deeper and harder than she’s ever had before.

  Twisting her around, I wrap my arms around her and press my rigid cock up against her bare ass. I let her feel the weight of my girth against her crack, grinding my hips forward. I tease her with what I could take.

  “I can’t wait to fuck your tight little pussy again. I want to feel you cum on my cock.” I push her shoulders, lowering her so her hands and knees are on her fur coat. I know she’s cold, but I’m about to make good on my word to warm her up. The frosty nip of the cold on her extremities won’t even register when I’m done with her.

  I hold my wide hand between her shoulder blades, kneeling behind her, and gently but firmly push her head down to the floor. Watching her soft, pale ass swaying has me transfixed.

  No woman should be this sexy. It’s a crime against men’s restraint. I know I’m throwing mine to the wayside as I admire the rosy flesh exposed inside her lips. Pearly beads of desire have formed in her entrance, enticing me, exciting me. I can’t resist. Seconds later, I’m grabbing hold of my cock and teasingly sliding it up and down, just inside her pussy. I slip the head of my cock from her tight asshole to her clit, smearing her juices over my shaft with my hand as I jerk myself a couple of times.

  Her nectar covers my cock, making it easily slide inside her to the core, despite how tight she is. She fits around me like a custom leather glove, her warmth surrounding me.

  I fuck her like I’m trying to melt the snow and ice below us. She twists her ass, pushing back against me every time I bottom out inside her, giving me the deepest access to her center possible. Reaching around her hips, I make quick work of finding her sensitive nub hidden in her mound. Pressing just above her button,
I move my finger in little circles, easily sliding with her natural lubricant dripping on my fingertip.

  Suddenly, she stops moving. Her pussy clenches and trembles around my cock, milking it for my seed as she cries out my name to the forest. Even with the muffling the snow walls of this survival shelter provide, I’m sure every animal in a two-mile radius can hear her screams.

  My balls tighten and clench as I slam my cock into her faster. Faster than I think I’ve ever fucked anyone. With her muscles bearing down on me, she feels as tight as a virgin against my thick girth. My balls tighten as I spill my cum into her, filling her with my seed.

  When the last tremors stop and I’ve emptied my seed, I lean over her, lying still against her on the wet, cold floor. Neither of us seems to mind the noticeably frigid air swirling around us. The heat of our bodies warms the small space and I pull out of her, lying on my parka with her next to me, and cover us with her fur jacket.

  This is perfection. I kiss the back of her neck. “I love you.” The words tumble free from my mouth before I have a chance to think about them. My heart twists with fear that I’ve said too much, too quickly. Surely, she can feel my heartbeat rapidly firing against her back.

  “I love you too,” she whispers. There’s no doubt in her sleepy tone. It sounds like the words she was born to say. Like they’re as true as the seasons and as important as the sun.

  I let the breath I didn’t realize I was holding out and pull her in tight against me. My eyes feel heavy, but my soul is light. She loves me. Right now, this moment is all that matters. The thoughts I’ve had about whether or not she’ll return with me to my cottage evaporate and are replaced by one swirling, sleepy phrase.

  “I love you.”

  26

  Elsie

  My eyes flutter open and I can see a blue glow from our icy hut’s roof. It’s so peaceful inside this shelter with Sawyer, and so much warmer than I expected. Of course, lying tangled up in him, our naked bodies interwoven certainly helps keep the cold at bay. Not to mention all the other ways he kept my blood pumping all night. I’ve never met someone who can fuck me over and over until we’re both exhausted and barely able to utter a single word. He’s a beast. I let my fingertips explore the hair on his chest as I enjoy the silence.

  My beast.

  I never wake up before Sawyer. I must have really tired him out. I lean over and look at his masculine features. I love how his beard twitches when he’s all worked up. I love how he can be so grizzled on the outside but have such a warm heart. I carefully unwrap his huge arms from around me and shiver as I slide out from under the coats. The cold motivates me to dress quicker than I probably ever have before. I peel my coat from on top of Sawyer and wrap myself in it. I want to take a look outside and see if we still need to stay hunkered down, or if we can head back to the cabin.

  I crawl through the small entrance and bump into something hard. Turning around on my belly, I see that it’s the rifle Sawyer brought. A flurry of movement catches my eye from outside and I look up and realize that probably ten feet from the entrance to our snow cave is a huge white rabbit.

  So slowly it’s almost painful, I reach beside me and ease the gun up to my shoulders. My eyes never leave the rabbit. I’m going to make Sawyer so proud when I provide our next meal. The idea warms me from the frosty air.

  I maneuver the rifle up silently, careful not to make a sound that would disturb the hare. My breathing is shallow and my body is still as I manage to get the gun in position and look over the barrel at the little triangle marker. Taking aim, I squeeze the trigger and a shot echoes through the forest like a clap of thunder. I didn’t realize I had also squeezed my eyes shut until I have to open them again and search the ground outside for the fallen rabbit.

  All I see is white. Pristine, unbloodied, fluffy white snow as far as I can see.

  I twist and crawl until I’m free from the snow cave and stand up, spinning around in circles as I look for the hare. Where is it? There’s no way I missed it. Is there?

  The tracks on the ground confirm that the rabbit got away. There’s no sign that I did anything except give him a scare.

  I slump over with disappointment. How can I be such a failure?

  “What was that? Are you okay?” Sawyer emerges from the drift with his clothes strewn on and his eyes wide. “I heard a gunshot.” He looks at me.

  I don’t want to cry about this. It would be stupid to. Yet, I can’t stop my chin from quivering as I look down at the scuffed tracks of the rabbit that easily got away.

  “I tried to shoot a rabbit, but I missed,” I confess to my snow-dusted boots.

  “Why didn’t you come get me?” Sawyer frowns and I feel the exact opposite of how I imagined I would when I grabbed his gun. I wanted to make him proud of me, not scowl at me.

  “I don’t know. I fucked up, I guess.” My chin quakes and emotions flood me as I’m reminded of the familiar feeling that’s been haunting me my whole life. Not good enough.

  Not smart enough.

  Not pretty enough.

  Not popular enough.

  Not fucking enough.

  Tears blur my vision and spill onto my cheeks. “I thought I could do it, but I messed up. I’m sorry.” I turn away from him, not able to face his frown for even one more second.

  “Elsie.” He grabs my arms and pulls me back. “Hey, it’s not the end of the world. Every hunter has the one that gets away. More of them than we’d like to admit. I was just worried you got hurt or saw a wolf. I don’t care that you didn’t hit the rabbit.” He pulls me into him tight and the weight of his muscular arms feels comforting against my back. Like he’s built a wall around me that can protect me from everything, even the horrible voice in my head that tells me I’m nothing. My mother’s voice.

  “You’re not angry?”

  “Why would I be? I don’t care.” He shakes his head and gives me another squeeze. “I’m fine eating whatever. I just hope you don’t mind when we’ve got to crack open the baked beans I left in the cabin.” He smiles at me and my anxiety melts away like this mountain of snow will under the warmth of the spring sun. In my heart, the blooms of love grow.

  I hug him tight, not wanting to feel the cold space where his warmth once was. Not wanting to put even inches between us, let alone the miles I know are coming soon.

  “The storm has passed,” he muses, looking up around us at the clear sky.

  I follow his gaze and wish that the baby blue peeking in around the tree tops brought me joy. Instead, I feel dread. Our time is counting down. This is the end.

  “We should probably get back to the cabin and get everything sorted out.” He kisses my nose quickly and I can’t help but smile. Something so innocent, so sweet, it’s so unexpected from someone who looks like him. “Okay,” I agree, but I don’t move. My muscles are still as I wish I could hold on to this moment forever as tightly as he is holding on to me.

  “Wait here, I’ll grab the stuff.” He steps back, breaking our embrace. I watch wordlessly as he shimmies back inside the snow cave. Waiting, I look back at the sky and find myself silently praying for another storm. However, even though I’m no expert like Sawyer, I can feel in the air that the worst has passed. Doesn’t that mean that the best is yet to come?

  Then why am I filled with so much dread?

  27

  Sawyer

  With the fire crackling and popping the song of warmth in the living room, I open the barren cupboard and stare at my limited options for food. I keep hoping that, somehow, I’ve missed the ingredients to make a nice spaghetti dinner, like if I keep staring at the desolate shelf, food will suddenly appear behind the can of baked beans or the box of stale crackers.

  No such luck.

  Elsie walks over and peers in. “Pretty bleak, huh?”

  “Yeah, it doesn’t look good,” I admit. “What are you doing with that?” I look down at the cell phone in her hand. I thought she’d given up on that thing by now.

  “Checkin
g if there’s signal. There isn’t.” She doesn’t look upset about it for once. “I’m amazed I still have battery left. I guess it’s from shutting it off,” she muses.

  “Yeah, isn’t it amazing how much longer it lasts when it isn’t clinging to your hand like a baby attached to an umbilical cord?”

  “Yeah, yeah.” She waves me off. “I get it. I think I’ve done pretty well, actually.” She lifts her chin and levels me with her beautiful blue eyes. I breathe in sharply as the color transports me to the serenity of the lake by my home. In the oppressive heat of the summer, there’s nothing I love more than diving into that lake. I love relaxing in the water as the ripples of blue wash over me, refreshing me and bringing me back to life.

  “You have done well,” I admit and wrap my arm around her waist, pulling her in close. “I’m proud of you.” I quickly kiss her soft lips.

  “Thank you.” She looks up at me from under her heavy, dark eyelashes. I can see a glint of pride dancing in the pools of blue, adding vibrancy like when the lake comes to life with fish and wildlife under the hot summer sun.

  “So, I already know what I want to eat for dessert,” I murmur in her ear, “but I should figure out what I’m going to feed you for supper first.”

  Her pink, plump lips pull up into a sweet smile and I can’t help but kiss her again. This time I savor her lips parting under mine. I enjoy how our tongues join and dance together.

  “Mmmm.” She pulls away from me slowly, like she’s fighting the laws of gravity just to put a step between us. As if the universe would rather we never were apart. “Okay, I’ll let you get to it then.” She slides from my side and coasts over the worn floor to the living room.

  Elsie absentmindedly picks up my radio and spins the handle until a channel tunes in. Snowy static fills the air, much like the snow that’s been filling the air outside for days now. She plays around with the tuning wheel as I grab the beans from the cupboard with a defeated sigh.